Lean Into It

I have very specific tastes. I only like certain kinds of art or music or books or movies. I prefer things to be done one way over another. And the more stuff I see, the pickier I get.

But - and this is a big BUT - there is always an exception.

For instance, I was never really into rap but I can’t get enough Kendrick Lamar. And I don’t really seek out many musicals but Hamilton is the best thing I’ve ever seen. For every thing I don’t like there is an example that proves me wrong, urging me to rethink my opinions.

The exception isn’t the craft - the exception is the work that goes into it. The exception is the people who fully committed to their craft and worked hard to make it the best it could possibly be.

My favorite artists are the ones who are so full of enthusiasm for what they do that by the time I’m done watching them they make me want to learn more about it. When I watch Neil DeGrasse Tyson most of what he says goes right over my head, but his love for his work is so contagious that it makes me want to dive headfirst into a pile of science textbooks.

It seems to me that you don’t need to cater to the diehard fans of what you do. The musical theater junkies will be camping out for tickets like always and the science nuts will be first in line for the lectures.

It’s not the true fans you have to worry about. If you want to transcend and get people to appreciate your work on a different level, then you have to think about the people who don’t care about what you do at all. Those are the people that matter most.

The best way to get those people to care is to lean into your craft so hard that you can’t be ignored. It doesn’t matter if what you do is silly or serious, cheesy or complicated - it only matters that you work at it so hard that the people who never noticed your genre before can’t look away.

Convincing the cynics to appreciate your work is no easy task. Doing what’s been done before is out of the question. You can’t go halfway, you can’t pander, you can’t patronize. Every ounce of your work has to silently scream “HEY! THIS MATTERS TO ME AND IT SHOULD MATTER TO YOU!”

When I see a cringe-worthy performance the cringe comes from the performer not going far enough. You can sense they want to cringe, too. Instead of leaning into their schtick, they shy away from the moment they’re trying to create. They are ashamed or uncomfortable with what they do and it shows.  But it doesn’t have to be that way.

Either go down a different path or f*cking OWN IT. Embrace the absurd, own the over-the-top, commit to your choices, and force me to care about what you do. Make me become a fan of something I never knew I liked before. I want to, but you’ve got to show me why I should. And there’s only one way to do that.

You’ve got to lean into it.

Take A Break

At the end of last year I was feeling pretty burnt out.

I had just finished The Mystery Tour, finished one of my busiest stretches of Holiday shows in November and December, and was going through a bit of an existential crisis. Plus, I wasn’t feeling inspired with any of my creative projects. I felt like they were all starting to blend together and the work was suffering because I couldn’t give any of them the attention they deserved.

I needed a break.

So I gave myself some time off from #ThursdayThoughts. I took that time to work on other things.

I made preparations for my AFSP Fundraiser Show, wrote a couple (soon-to-be-published) books, made some videos, worked on my new show, and did a lot of yoga. I read some books and changed gyms. I forgot about my blog completely so I could give myself time to feel inspired again.

Originally, I had planned to take all of January off but one night I looked at the calendar and realized it was Wednesday.

“Man, I really miss Thursday Thoughts,” I said to myself.

So I sat down and wrote out the first post of the year. I was back at it again.

It just took a few weeks away to feel reinvigorated and more creative than ever.

The same goes for my workouts, my show, and any other goals I tackle each year. I give myself rest days, time off, and vacations to self-reflect and recharge before I get after it again.

I’ve been training for the Chicago Marathon since January, working out five days a week and logging a ton of miles. The last time I trained I tried to do too much. I was running while I was traveling, barely sleeping, and not giving myself time to recover. And my body paid the price.

I spent the last two years in physical therapy, stretching, and learning to run all over again. I’m not going to make that mistake again.

So I’m taking it slow this time. I’m running slower paces, shorter distances and gradually working myself up to marathon speeds. If all goes well, I should reach my goal mid-summer with a couple months left to keep improving.

Thanks to my newfound approach, I’m making great progress. I feel great and I’ve lost 15 pounds since the new year even though I’m only running a few days a week.

Instead of pushing myself to get out every day and keep the streak going, I take the weekends off. I can still enjoy brunch and keep making progress. Taking a break doesn’t have to mean you’re giving up.

I’ve never liked the “unbroken streak” mentality. I prefer to think of my goals as a giant bucket of water. Each run or workout or blog entry or rehearsal is a drop in the bucket. By the end of the year, I may have taken a few days off each week but overall that bucket is pretty damn full.

You don’t have to do everything at once and you don’t have to do things how other people do them. You just need to learn to do things the best way for you. And if that means rest days in between meetings and long runs then so be it.

If you takeaway anything from this, just remember that before you can take action you need to take the time to take control of your situation. Take a moment to take care of yourself before you take flight again. Take it from me, sometimes the best way to make progress is to take a break.

Push Through

“Any big plans for the weekend?” my trainer asked me last Friday.

“Just have some writing projects I’m working on!” I replied.

“Oh, that sounds like fun,” she said. “How do you work? Like, what’s your writing process?”

I told her exactly what I tell you now:

My writing process is that I tell myself “Tomorrow I’m going to write as much as possible!” and I carve out as much time as my schedule will allow so I can get creative and finish some projects.

Then when “tomorrow” comes I think about my writing all day, telling myself that I should probably sit down and get to work. I pace my studio, drink too much coffee, and do anything I can to avoid the task at hand.

Then, around bedtime, I finally sit down and write two or three sentences. Another successful day of writing in the books!

Since I started keeping a consistent blog 18 months ago a lot of people have asked me about my process. But the truth is…I don’t really have one. All I do is just think about writing as much as possible.

Most of the time I struggle to put my concepts into words, let alone a series of paragraphs worth reading. The key is to not give up. I know by now that if I just push through my creative roadblocks then a good essay is waiting to be discovered.

The same goes for my show.

I rarely rehearse it start to finish. Instead, I start to work on a new idea but barely get anywhere. So I’ll work on bits and pieces at random moments. I’ll talk through the script in the shower. I’ll pace through the blocking while I’m on the phone with a client. The new piece slowly comes together in sections, often over many months, but only if I don’t give up and push through.

A couple weeks ago I was trying to come up with a slogan for a special event. I wanted something catchy and to the point, so I started brainstorming with a friend. Everything we came up with was either incredibly stupid or had already been done before. Before I knew it, I was frustrated beyond belief. I decided to abandon the whole idea and hung up the phone in disgust.

I turned to leave the room and stopped dead in my tracks as the perfect slogan popped into my head. My good idea had only been minutes away and I had nearly lost it. I just needed to push through to the other side.

You can call it writer’s block or discomfort or rejection or the creative struggle. You can get frustrated when you run out of ideas and mad when you don’t have any to begin with. You can admit when you don’t know what to do next…

But whatever you do, don’t give up. Don’t give in to the struggle. Don’t give up on the work. You never know when your best idea might be one more sentence away. Push yourself to keep working. Push past the fear. Push aside your doubts and know that you’ve been creative before and you’ll be creative again.

Push through.

Demand Their Respect

I got heckled for the first time in a while last week.

There was a group of people who had taken full advantage of the open bar and were being loud and obnoxious all night long.

The event was an exclusive night of mystery with a lineup of four of the finest performers in the city, including myself. One hundred guests, four entertainers, and non-stop amazement.

It’s held once a month at a luxury hotel downtown, complete with fully catered hors d'oeuvres, live music, and some of the most mind-blowing acts you’ve ever seen. Plus, a national magazine was interviewing us that night for a feature article coming out later this year.

So yeah, it was kind of a big deal.

Which made it even stranger when those six guests started being so rude. They started yelling things out during the other performers’ shows. Not clever things, not helpful things….just disruptive, rude comments that were distracting the other guests and making it hard for the performers to concentrate.

My fellow entertainers were doing their best to be polite and stay in control of the situation, but word got out and other guests were quick to alert me of “the people in the other room who think the show is all about them.”

Honestly, I’m not sure you can even count these people as hecklers. They were in a world of their own. They were having loud conversations without a care in the world for anyone else in their general vicinity. They weren’t trying to disrupt the show on purpose and they weren’t trying to outsmart the performers. They were just a bunch of a**holes.

Ordinarily I would be patient with a heckler. I would kindly ask them to repeat their comment and make a simple joke along the lines of “Settle down, this is my show!” or something similar. It would get a laugh, win everyone over, and get the heckler on board.

But last week was different.

I’d been watching these people be rude for several hours. I’d seen them yell across the room, interrupt the shows, and refuse to stop talking while my friends were performing. And by the time I got onstage it was really starting to piss me off.

So I took control of the room and began my opening mind reading demonstration.

“You’re an Aquarius, aren’t you? Born in February…February 10th?”

Everyone oohed and ahhed and applauded loudly as I read each person’s mind in turn. Then, as I continued with my act, I heard a group of people talking in the second row. They were at it again.

So I dropped everything. I stopped what I was doing, walked towards the group, and waited for the room to get quiet.

“You have the wrong idea,” I said.

“I do 150 shows a year and I chose to make one of those shows this one. So when I’m onstage I demand your respect. A lot of people in this room paid a lot of money to see me do this. And now I’m up here working and you are disrespecting me while I’m at work. So, yes, this is an interactive performance but it’s participatory on my terms, NOT yours. Understood?”

The ringleader of the group looked at me in horror, shocked that she was being reprimanded in front of other adults. Then, she shut up and didn’t speak again for the rest of my time onstage. They may have left at some point but I can’t be sure, because I was worried about the other 94 people who wanted to see a good show.

I can’t stand people who disrespect me during a show and I refuse to put up with it. I honed my skills doing difficult gigs in tough rooms for little pay and now I realize that while I was struggling to find my voice and learn my craft, I was slowly building up a confidence that can’t be shaken.

I have a confidence in myself now that is only born out of doing a thousand shows. I know when I walk onstage that I am good at what I do. I’m positive that what I do is worth watching and worthy of someone else’s respect. And so, I don’t have to put up with anyone’s bullsh*t any more because I already spent years doing that.

What I’ve learned is that if you value your time and respect your craft then you don’t have to put up with a heckler.

Your family will tell you to have a backup plan or a teacher will tell you to get a real job. People will act like they know what’s best for you, without taking the time to really listen to your plan. And time and time and time again people will shut the door to your dreams in your face.

Those are the hecklers on the journey towards your chosen destination. Those are the people who want to tell you what you should be doing, even though they don’t want to work as hard as you do. They’ll always be there, eager to disrupt and disrespect, and it’s up to you to shut them up.

You have to demand their respect.

The Rise Of Magic In Chicago

Magic has seen a resurgence lately in popular culture, television, movies, and more. Nowhere is the rise of magic more prevalent than in the city I call home, where some of the world’s finest magicians are amazing audiences on a nightly basis.

These performers are my friends, encouraging me to improve and learn from each and every show. These performers are my competition, pushing me to keep getting better and working harder on my act. Most importantly, these performers are setting the tone for the next generation of magical performers so that one day, like I did years ago, a young boy or girl may sit in the audience at one of their shows and whisper to themselves “I want to do that!”

These performers are the future of magic.

This newfound popularity of magic has forged the path for some of Chicago’s most amazing venues and shows. In an attempt to highlight some of my friends and spread the word about their shows, please see below for a list of places you can see live magic in Chicago. I will do my best to keep this list updated so be sure to check back from time to time for all current shows!

Chicago Magic Lounge - The CML will quite literally blow your mind. Secret passages, great food, and unbelievable entertainment await you seven days a week. (Here's a cool behind-the-scenes video I made at the Grand Opening last month.)

The Magic Parlour - On Fridays and Saturdays Dennis Watkins presents an intimate, astonishing show that will delight and astound everyone. Plus, it's in the beautiful Palmer House Hilton Hotel in downtown Chicago, making it a truly unforgettable experience.

The Magic Penthouse - Enjoy a night of cocktails, live music, and four strolling magicians in a fancy location in downtown Chicago. The show happens once a month and you can catch me there tomorrow, March 2nd!

Lindberg & Hanthorn - My friends Eric Lindberg and Stephen Hanthorn are combining their talents for a twice-monthly show at the Uptown Underground. Part-magic, part-mentalism, and 100% fun.

Near Death Experience - Neil Tobin is presenting his award-winning show at Rosehill Cemetery starting later this month. "Grown up, dead serious fun!"

The 13th Hour - Just outside of the city, mentalist Joe Diamond presents a spooky weekly show that is limited to just 13 attendees. Oh yeah, it's in a "haunted mansion", too.

Vaudeville at Bordel - Every Thursday, three-time "Best Magician in Chicago" winner AJ Sacco dazzles the crowd at Bordel with his magical stylings.

Logan Arcade - Magician Justin Purcell will blow your mind at the Logan Arcade on Tuesdays between 9pm and midnight.

Magic & History - Magician and author William Pack's shows uniquely combine magic, storytelling, and history. His shows happen at many theaters, libraries, and clubs throughout the Chicagoland area year round.

Pleasant Home - Jeanette Andrews will be presenting elegant "sensory magic" at Pleasant Home in Oak Park starting March 15th.

And finally, there's The Mystery Show - my secret, invite-only mind reading show in Chicago. Just join the list below and you'll be the first to know when and where it happens next.

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Note to performers: If I missed your show or you have something new coming up, please let me know and I'll get it added to this post.

Getting Better

You get better by doing. Doing makes things better. It makes you better.

But what do you do?

You do you.

You do things your way. You try and try and try again.

You find a place and do your thing. And when you’re doing that thing you do it your way.

Just do it.

Do what you want where you can as often as possible. Then do it some more.

The more you do it the better you’ll get.

The question of getting better has a simple answer - although it’s anything but easy. Doing is hard because doing takes work.

If it was easy everyone would be doing it. But you’re not everyone - you’re you. So get out there and start doing it.

You’ll be better in no time.

There's A Place For You

It doesn’t matter if you’re not tall enough or not talented enough, it doesn’t matter if you have famous parents or never finished school. It doesn’t matter where you’re from, when you started, how you got here, or where you’re going.

It doesn’t matter if you fail as long as you keep trying. It doesn’t matter how many mistakes you’ve made as long as you keep getting better. It doesn’t matter if you don’t hold office hours or sleep in everyday.

It doesn’t matter if you don’t do it how everyone says it’s supposed to be done. It doesn’t matter if everyone says it can’t be done.

Nothing matters except for the way you do things.

Everyone else had something in their way that they had to overcome. They were too short or too slow or too old or too young. They were too privileged or not privileged enough. They had to push all that aside and prove themselves to someone else.

Everyone else was just getting started once, just like you are now. There was a place for them and there’s a place for you.

In With The Good

One of my cats got spooked this week and flew off the couch like a bat out of hell. He bounded over the coffee table, scattering everything he touched onto the floor. A giant splatter of coffee left a caffeine rorshach test on the wall and my favorite coffee mug lay shattered on the wood floor.

It was a mug from the first marathon I ran in 2014. Each morning I took a sip of coffee from that mug and it reminded me of all the hard work I had put in to finish that race. It reminded me that anything is possible with focus and determination. And I liked the colors and the shape and the feel of that mug. It was just perfect.

At first I was dejected and sadly swept up the pieces. I threw it down the chute and searched online for a replacement. But that mug isn’t available any more. It’s gone for good.

The thing is, I have a lot of mugs - maybe too many. The cabinet is completely full. Well, at least it was. But now there’s space for one more. 

For over a year I’ve stopped buying cool mugs because the cabinet was too full. I didn’t have the space. So I didn’t get that awesome mug in London or Mt. Zion or New York City. I couldn’t justify it.

But now that my favorite mug is gone, I have space for another. I can finally update the cabinet with something new. I’m going to make the most out of a bad situation.

Part of being a self-employed artist is learning to turn something bad into something good. In fact, dealing with negativity is a good skill to have no matter what you do.

I was thinking about that a lot lately, so I spent the last few days reaching out to some friends and asking them a simple question:

What do you do to turn a negative into a positive?

Here are some of the answers...

“When things that are beyond my control make me upset I try to let them go. I can only control my reaction in that scenario so I try to stay clam and not freak out. If I sink into those feelings I always end up feeling worse than if I just let go.”

“I consider that there might be something going on that I don’t know about. Maybe a person is having a bad day or has something else on their mind and that’s why they were rude to me. I assume the best whenever possible.”

“I try to turn my whole attitude positive to attack a negative. I’ll try to find anything positive about it, and use it to break down my feelings about the negative. I tend to the able to approach and tackle the problem without making it too personal.”

“Often ‘the negative’ you experience will not be readily overcome in the moment. The negative will only transition into a positive after thoughtfully examining the factors that created the negative situation. Sometimes that’s why life is the best teacher and helps us learn from our mistakes.”

“I focus on learning or growth opportunities from whatever that negative may be. There are two quotes I like that come to mind... 1) Success is a series of corrected mistakes. 2) The secret of happiness is not ‘being great’, the secret is ‘growth’. So whatever I can do to use this negative to improve myself is what I shoot for.”

“It sounds cliché but I view it as a learning experience and try to pick something out of it that I can improve upon.”

“I usually talk to my wife about everything and she always helps me see the positive angle in situations. Talking always helps. It’s hard for me to rely on my own strengths to get through a negative situation, but I try and surround myself with positive people. That positive energy motivates me to get through negative moments.”

“Usually I think about how the negative thing isn’t that bad and start brainstorming ways to fix it. Or accept it, if it can’t be fixed. My first reaction is usually emotional and I accept that the emotional reaction is natural and necessary. I process the emotion and then move on to doing something about it. Along the way, I pick up new skills or knowledge so that by the time I’m done, I feel that I’ve accomplished something and know that if I can handle that thing again if it comes up.”

“I first start by acknowledging the negative thought without judging it. I then try to take a look at where it comes from in my life. And than I practice being gentle with myself. I create a positive reframe that my heart finds true. Reframing with gentleness and authenticity. And breathing.”

It became very clear as I was reading these answers this week that there's no single, perfect method for dealing with negativity. But all of my friends had a personal anecdote or experience that they reflected on and took time to share with me. It happens to everyone.

The truth is, when you choose to put yourself out there at all you are inviting criticism. You’re taking a risk that someone will troll you or leave you a bad review or tell you it can’t be done. Ironically, a lot of negativity comes from trying to bring a little positivity into the world.

So you learn to deal with the bullsh*t by turning it into something else. You take criticism and let it motivate you, you turn the trolls into lifelong fans, you erase that bad review with a hundred glowing ones. Out with the bad and in with the good.

This week I dug out some old emails and show reviews from years ago. They were from high-strung clients and know-it-all critics. Even looking back, I still feel like the criticism was unjustified. It felt petty and malicious, like the comments were full of spite and completely unhelpful.

Reading through them stirred up a lot of old feelings. I remember being unable to sleep when I got my first bad show review. I recall nervously pacing my hotel room when a client personally attacked me via email over a misunderstanding. It was rough.

But I also remember learning from those experiences and realizing that I didn’t have to put up with those people ever again. I learned I could say no to things that didn’t make me happy or caused me stress. I learned that nothing is ever that big of a deal, that bad things will happen but life goes on. I learned how to turn a negative into a positive.

And so, I printed out those e-mails and turned them into some redacted poetry. Now those negative words are mine. The mean comments have been repurposed into something good. I deleted the original emails and made room for these poems instead.

Time to find a new mug.

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Stop

Stop.

Stop what you’re doing. Look up from your screen. Look out the window. Look around.

Stop wasting your time doing things you don’t enjoy. It’s your time. It’s your life to live. It’s up to you to make the most of it.

Stop thinking about what comes next. Don’t worry about tomorrow or next week or next year. Don’t check your notifications for an hour. Don’t log on or sign in. Don’t let yourself be anywhere but in the moment.

Stop comparing yourself to other people. Quit sizing them up. Quit keeping score. Quit worrying about things that are out of your control.

Stop at nothing. Don’t give up. Don’t take no for an answer. Don’t let anyone tell you it can’t be done.

Stop and smell the roses. It’s beautiful out here without a smartphone in your hand. It’s a lovely day to make your dreams come true. It’s all within arm’s reach if you only stop to look around.

Okay, it’s your turn. You know what to do.

Now, GO.