In high school my drama teacher introduced me to a person who would change my life. Since then this person has pushed me to be a better version of myself, they’ve forced me to be more creative, and they’ve never let me settle for mediocre when they knew I could do better.
Now, it’s your turn. Allow me to introduce you to…Mr. Frank.
Mr. Frank is always there when I need honest criticism. Mr. Frank doesn’t say things to make me feel better, he only speaks the truth. Mr. Frank tells it like it is.
“Hello, I’m Mr. Frank...Brutally Frank.”
When my drama teacher needed to give us feedback on an assignment he would say “Allow me to be Mr. Frank for a moment. First name Brutally…” Then he’d proceed to give (sometimes harsh) feedback to help us improve. But since it was Mr. Frank speaking we knew not to take it personally. Deep down we knew that Mr. Frank only wanted to help us.
Mr. Frank always has your best interests in mind. Sometimes what Mr. Frank says may hurt your feelings or piss you off, but Mr. Frank doesn’t care. Mr. Frank is just being honest.
Everyone needs a Mr. (or Mrs.) Frank in their life. It could be your wife or husband, your creative partner, your brother, your sister, your teacher, your mom or your dad. It just needs to be someone you trust to be honest when you need feedback. But you have to promise to never get offended when they speak the truth. We all need Mr. Frank’s feedback to help us get better but we have to be willing to listen, learn, and improve - all without getting angry or refusing to accept the help.
The thing is, it's really easy to find Mr. Frank. It’s much harder to learn to listen to him. Being willing to accept harsh criticism without taking it personally is a skill that you have to work at. You have to develop a thick skin and be willing to let Mr. Frank tell you all the things you’re doing wrong. But if you can get there - if you can be gracious and accepting of that feedback - then you’ll never miss out on Mr. Frank’s insights.
Just remember: Mr. Frank wants to help you. So when Mr. Frank speaks, shut up and listen. Don’t react or get defensive. Don’t allow yourself to become upset. Just listen quietly, accept the feedback, and say thank you. That’s how you will get better.
“Hello, I’m Mr. Frank. How can I help you?”
Other Thoughts:
Here’s some Quarantine Mind Reading for you: